Here are some true facts about me:

  1. I’ve published two volumes of original poetry.
  2. A tiger once roared at me while I was wearing a tuxedo.
  3. I worked as a full-time rave promoter from 1999-2001.
  4. I saved a child’s life in Paris.
  5. I’ve been on the front page of Reddit.
  6. I spent my teenage years living on a peacock farm with two moms.
  7. Once, with a casual, off-hand remark, I made an entire elevator full of SNL cast members laugh.
  8. I’ve run three marathons.
  9. I’m the 1990 Nintendo Power World Championship quarter-finalist.