Sometimes you get a hold of an album you really want to like, but for reasons beyond your control, it just doesn’t stick. Tekashi69’s latest, ‘Dummy Boy’ is not one of those albums, because I want nothing to like about the Brooklyn rapper. Going into ‘Dummy Boy’ I secretly prayed it would suck and bless my heart, it does so does. Given 6ix9nine’s legal troubles, having been recently incarcerated on racketeering charges, being captured on video putting a hit out on a fellow rapper, and being accused of prison snitching, there are somehow still more reasons to hate the rainbow bagel of rap.
‘Dummy Boy’ just stinks.
A couple glimmers of light shine through on an otherwise forgettable, 13-track odyssey of mediocrity. STOOPID (feat. Bobby Shmurda) moves nicely, but if there’s a record for shortest ever guest verse on a rap song, Bobby Shmurder must now hold it. His ultra-filtered bars last all of 10 seconds of the two-and-a-half minute track and it really really sounds like he literally spit them over the phone.
I’m kind of into Keke (feat. Tory Lanez). The familiar sea punk sample and bouncing bass line makes me dance in my seat, but not enough to go banging it in the back of my next Uber ride.
MAMA (feat. Nicki Minaj, Kanye West) is embarrassing. Kanye and Nicki took a wrong turn aligning themselves with 69 and it’s just because he’s a confessed pedophile sex offender. Kanye’s up against the wall these days for claiming African American slavery was a choice, so collaborating on a track with an embattled rapper who frankly is still pretty new on the scene could be seen as risky. Nicki too perhaps rolled the dice on this one, given her ongoing (and in my opinion, losing) battle with A-list femme-cee Cardi B. Unfortunately, the risk didn’t pay off. MAMA is a miss.
WONDO is the only track I genuinely like and I think it’s because it reminds me of that Lazy Town x Lil’ Wayne mashup.
The good news is, in the end, a shitty person made a shitty album.