Exclusive: iPhone Says Azealia Banks Put Tekashi 6ix9ine, Entire Planet on Blast

Posted by on Nov 28, 2018 in Uncategorized | No Comments

When Harlem rapper Azealia Banks unlocks her phone to access the Internet, the mobile device trembles with fear. “Oh, girl. What are you about to get us into this time?” Banks’s Apple iPhone X said in an exclusive interview, Tuesday. “Every time I wake up, I see her face and know she’s about to get us into some s**t.”

The flustered cell phone’s anguish is understandable. The “212” rapper’s usual flow of digital vitriol ticked up over the weekend, issuing shade upon shade to rappers throughout the game. Banks dragged the surprisingly similarly-named Australian Iggy Azalea in response to a paid social media ad Azalea posted for Flat Tummy Tea.

According to XXL, Banks claimed that the Aussie made fun of her soap brand, CHEAPYXO early this month and the diss on the Tummy Tea was her way of clapping back. (In a related story, Azealia Banks has a soap brand.)


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“That girl is always clapping back at someone,” the iPhone said in the form of emojis consisting of a finger pointing, a girl’s face, hands clapping, that one with the arrow and the word “back,” and then a question mark.

However, the product endorsement debacle pales in comparison to the drama Banks stirred up over the weekend between herself, Lucky Charms-flavored rapper and sex criminal, 6ix9nine, Kanye West, and Nikki Minaj. Human Italian rainbow cookie, 6ix9ine’s forthcoming album, “Dummy Boy” was shelved temporarily when the Paas Easter Egg dye factory fire was jailed on racketeering charges. Then, the album was leaked Saturday night. Then, Azealia Banks posted a clip from a verse she performed with the prism-headed 22-year-old along with Kanye West on, “Feefa” a track slated for the album’s track list.

Azealia Banks's iphone

“I’m ashamed of the things I’ve done.” — Azealia Banks’s iPhone X

“Since it’s leaked, might as well throw my bid in,” Banks posted on Instagram following shortly after.

“Lord, why did she have to do that?” The perplexed iPhone said. “I kept trying to block her with a software update, but there was no stopping her.”

According to BET.com, the verse received a tepid response from fans on social media.

“Sometimes I wish she’d leave me off the charger and just let me die.”

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